Wednesday, July 11, 2007

It will be ok

The thunder came so suddenly we all jumped. Chris and I just laughed and looked at each other but then paused to see which of our 3 children would wake up crying. Tonight, it was Neil who hadn't actually fallen asleep yet but had been quiet nonetheless. It was his scared cry so I went to his room to comfort him.

I wrapped my arms around his trembling body and told him it was ok. Funny thing is he didn't act scared - his young bravado was evident as he said, "hi, mommy" as nonchalantly as he could - but the fact that he was shaking told me enough. After a minute, thinking he was fine, I started to leave but he grabbed my arm and made it clear that he wasn't ready for me to go yet. I had already told him his requisite 4 bed times stories and I was too tired of them to say them once again so I made up a story about a little, lonely cloud who made friends with other clouds and they danced and played in the sky. They clapped (thunder) and flashed their flashlights (lightning - not original but, hey, I was improvising). His body visibly calmed but soon he wanted me to "hang out with Neil" (i.e., play). It was time to go. He needed to sleep and I needed a moment of free time before I went to bed. I tucked him into his bed and gave him a hug. I told him again that he was ok - that the clouds were just playing and he told me, reassuringly, "you're ok, Mommy".

Last night, hearing him say that brought a chuckle up from my belly and warmed my heart. Tonight, after having another trying day (Neil had to get blood drawn for an allergy test, physical therapy for Evan, no phone call from doctor regarding my potential surgery, and discovery of a potentially huge plumbing issue with our house), I reminded myself of his sweet words and tried to reassure myself with his sweet words. Now, I'm going to go get a hug.

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